Puzzling MKM

[Rick In San Jose]

Tonight I ran a search for Michelle-related books on amazon.com. One of the books that came up in the results was this one:

Radical Islam and the Battle for the Americas: Tales of the Last Americans/The Complete Saga of a World at War (Paperback)
by Michelangelo (Author)

Apparently the book is a fictional story about a takeover of the United States by radical Muslims, and the response to the takeover by American freedom fighters. What's puzzling is this excerpt from p. 108 in the book:

"The stench of the dead stopped us from entering the other basements, but, if Michelle Kwan didn't hear the ruffling sounds of children from the connecting basements, we never would have seen them."

This is intriguing enough that I would have bought the book, except that it's priced at $29.99, a bit more than I can afford right now.

I'd be very interested to know if anyone has more information about Michelle's role as a character in this story.

[PurDiver]

Maybe a different person named Michelle Kwan?

[Nicki]

This was my thought too. Is there a public library near you? You could see if they carry the book. It would be a lot less expsnsive then buying the book sight unseen. If the book turned out to be about Michelle, you could always go back and buy a copy later.

[Miss Eggplant]

LOL! I don't know why, but that really just cracked me up. I kind of hope it was a really weird and bad fan fic type of thing, where they randomly insert Michelle Kwan as a character in a situation/book where she is totally out of place. On the other hand, it's probably just someone they named that? I don't know. Weird. Yet somehow funny.

ETA: Of course, I wouldn't want someone to even fictionally place Michelle in a book about "a takeover of the United States by radical Muslims." But at least in this excerpt perhaps she is saving small children? Anyway, it's disturbing but I admit I did laugh first.

And, and ALSO, FYI, I looked it up on Amazon and it was published by AuthorHouse. That's a vanity press. I'm just saying. So maybe they really DID use Michelle Kwan as a character.

[Rick In San Jose]

LOL! I don't know why, but that really just cracked me up. I kind of hope it was a really weird and bad fan fic type of thing, where they randomly insert Michelle Kwan as a character in a situation/book where she is totally out of place. On the other hand, it's probably just someone they named that? I don't know. Weird. Yet somehow funny.

ETA: Of course, I wouldn't want someone to even fictionally place Michelle in a book about "a takeover of the United States by radical Muslims." But at least in this excerpt perhaps she is saving small children? Anyway, it's disturbing but I admit I did laugh first.

And, and ALSO, FYI, I looked it up on Amazon and it was published by AuthorHouse. That's a vanity press. I'm just saying. So maybe they really DID use Michelle Kwan as a character.

Given the poorly written excerpt I quoted, it certainly sounds like some badly written fiction -- reminiscent of old 1950s Mickey Spillane novels. This would be confirmed by your information that the book is published by a vanity press.

Because the excerpt has Michelle apparently involved in rescuing children, I suspect that the author knows something about Michelle and her love for children, and is indeed intentionally using Michelle as a character. This, as opposed to the author just pulling the name "Michelle Kwan" out of thin air and the character not being Michelle at all.

If I ultimately break down and order the book, I'll provide a report on MKF. I probably won't order it, though, unless I find out that Michelle's presence -- IF she actually is a character -- in the story is much more substantial.

[IzzyS]

I'm with Nicki--go to the library and save your $29.99 (plus free shipping with orders over $25.00).

[Rick In San Jose]

I hope the book contains a scene where Michelle demolishes the terrorists with a fusilade of Wrath of Kwan flying sidekicks.

[Miss Eggplant]

Since it's published by a vanity press/POD/self-published place (whatever you want to call it, and yeah, I recognize there are differences, but AuthorHouse is I believe known for being a non-wise place to "publish" your book) it most definitely won't be in the library, or stores. So anyone who wants to read it for MK references to order it from Amazon and pay that hefty price for what I predict will be a rather bad book.

The best way to go about it may be to track down the writer or see if he or she has a website (what's with the Michelangelo name, btw?) and get in touch and ask how much MK has a role in the book. I'm sure they'd be happy to give more info, and if it sounds interesting, you could buy it. You could also try contacting AuthorHouse to get in touch with the writer, but I have no idea how much they'd be willing to help.

[AMAubert]

I hope the book contains a scene where Michelle demolishes the terrorists with a fusilade of Wrath of Kwan flying sidekicks.

I'd pay $29.99 to read that.

[michellesmom]

Maybe the author just named the character as a tribute to Michelle.

[Rick In San Jose]

There's just something about that excerpt which makes me suspect that the author is, indeed, using Michelle as a character, not just her name -- specifically, Michelle's affinity towards children. Without actually reading the book, however, I don't know. If Michelle is indeed a character in the book, I hope the author does her justice.

[Mathman]

"The stench of the dead stopped us from entering the other basements, but, if Michelle Kwan didn't hear the ruffling sounds of children from the connecting basements, we never would have seen them."

Given the poorly written excerpt I quoted...

I think we should all get together and help Michelangelo out. Here is my contribution:

Change "didn't hear" to "hadn't heard" and change "ruffling" to "rustling."

Now if someone can figure out what to do with that "but" and the commas...

[kittyjake5]

The excerpt sounds like it was stolen from the Power Rangers t.v. show that aired about 10 years ago. My nephew was crazy about that show and I watched quite a few episodes while babysitting. I believe the main Power Ranger was named Michaelangelo.

[Rick In San Jose]

I think we should all get together and help Michelangelo out. Here is my contribution:

Change "didn't hear" to "hadn't heard" and change "ruffling" to "rustling."

Now if someone can figure out what to do with that "but" and the commas...

On the other hand, maybe the author didn't mean "ruffling," but "riffling" as in the shuffling of playing cards, which could mean that the children were holding poker tournaments in those connecting basements.

As poorly written as the excerpt is, read the review posted on amazon by the author's SON. It's so horribly written that it's enough to make your skin crawl. I guess the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree. I can't help but wonder if both father and son did anything else in school but warm their chairs. In any event, I think I'll hang onto my $29.99.

In sharp contrast, read Michelle's eloquent and very well-written "On The Road" Ukraine trip blog. Just on the strength of her obvious writing talent and ability alone, I would buy a book -- any book -- written by Michelle without hesitation.

p.s.: The arthur Michelangelo, should of used their spellcheker and grammer cheker. expecially in the books Forward.

[Miss Eggplant]

As poorly written as the excerpt is, read the review posted on amazon by the author's SON. It's so horribly written that it's enough to make your skin crawl. I guess the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree. I can't help but wonder if both father and son did anything else in school but warm their chairs. In any event, I think I'll hang onto my $29.99.

In sharp contrast, read Michelle's eloquent and very well-written "On The Road" Ukraine trip blog. Just on the strength of her obvious writing talent and ability alone, I would buy a book -- any book -- written by Michelle without hesitation.

p.s.: The arthur Michelangelo, should of used their spellcheker and grammer cheker. expecially in the books Forward.

As a writer, I have a few definite opinions on self-published novels, and I can tell you that those opinions are almost universally negative. That's not to say that everyone who self publishes is a horrible writer who wrote a horrible book. Sometimes, self-publishing can actually be smart and profitable (if you have a very popular blog/website following and can therefore make more money by selling your books directly rather than giving most of it away to the publisher) or can just be a nice and convenient solution if your goal is to get your book printed on paper and distributed to friends and family. That's all cool. But I can tell you that when I hear a novel has been self-published and the author is trying to market it to try to rake in the money or "make it" in the publishing industry, I always inwardly groan. Big time. If I hear about a novel somehow (through a local writer's group, or on this site) and then I look it up and see it's self-published, I am immediately skeptical. Again, while there are exceptions, 9 times out of 10 the book is going to be bad. There's a reason why publishing a first novel with a "traditional" publisher is so darn hard.

Anyway, back on topic. Apparently, writing fictional stuff about characters based on famous people (David Foster Wallace and his story about Alex Trebec immediately comes to mind, for example) is legal or allowed...but still, I feel embarrassed that Michelle might even possibly be involved in self-published disasters.

I will ruffle away now.

[zueyduckel]

I agree about the usual weirdness of self-publishing, but without reading the book my hunch would be that it is just another character with the same name. I have a friend named Michelle Kwan (who hates people always asking about the other Michelle), and I don't think it's a particularly uncommon name... then again, I do feel like most people have heard of her, so picking the name for your character was maybe inspired by Michelle...

[Rick In San Jose]

Apparently, writing fictional stuff about characters based on famous people (David Foster Wallace and his story about Alex Trebec immediately comes to mind, for example) is legal or allowed...but still, I feel embarrassed that Michelle might even possibly be involved in self-published disasters.

I agree about the legality of using an actual celebrity as a character in a fictional work, as the rules in this regard differ between celebrities and unknown private citizens. However, if the celebrity is portrayed in a false and demeaning manner, I imagine the celebrity could sue the author for Libel.

[Mathman]

I believe the main Power Ranger was named Michaelangelo.

I think Michaelangelo was a Ninja Turtle. IIRC the Pink Power Ranger was "Kimberly." I don't remember if her last name on the TV show was Meissner.

In sharp contrast, read Michelle's eloquent and very well-written "On The Road" Ukraine trip blog. Just on the strength of her obvious writing talent and ability alone, I would buy a book -- any book -- written by Michelle without hesitation.

Truly, the writing on Michelle's blog is outstanding, yet fresh and with a unique personal style. I wonder if she has to run it by the State Departmnent proof readers. I especially liked her explanation of the difference in the spelling of Odes(s)a in Ukrainian and Russian.

[Rick In San Jose]

Truly, the writing on Michelle's blog is outstanding, yet fresh and with a unique personal style. I wonder if she has to run it by the State Departmnent proof readers. I especially liked her explanation of the difference in the spelling of Odes(s)a in Ukrainian and Russian.

I suspect that Michelle didn't have to run it by any proofreaders or editors. I truly look forward to reading more of her writing in the future, wherever it appears and in whatever form.

I'm a copy editor by trade, and I have an utterly improbable fantasy about Michelle hiring me to edit her Master's thesis -- a task I would jump at the chance to do for free. However, I would guess that her thesis will require little or no editing.

[Mathman]

I'm a copy editor by trade, and I have an utterly improbable fantasy about Michelle hiring me to edit her Master's thesis...

You stole my fantasy. Michelle decides to write her thesis in mathematics...

[Rick In San Jose]

You stole my fantasy. Michelle decides to write her thesis in mathematics...

I've got it! You edit her equations! I'll edit her text!