skatingfan
January 6th, 2000, 04:02 PM
In my fan fiction 008, the #1 golfer in the world will someday be the godfather of 6.0's children, so, stretching it a bit in MKFF. But this is kind of a fun fiction story. I know to many skating fans golf is a 4 letter word, but please hold judgment. The World is not enough for 008 - by Michael Shield PGATOUR.com columnist,12/19/99 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- She heard the office door swing open, but before the receptionist could spot who had arrived, she heard the "swoosh" of a NIKE cap soar thru the air and catch the hook at the top of the hat rack. With an excited knowing smile she turns from her typewriter to greet the visitor. "007," she blushed, "you've made your usual perfect entrance." "008, Ms. Moneylist." he corrected her with a lifted eyebrow, "I won 8 times this year, or weren't you watching?" "OH, I was watching, 008, you can bet on that, " she parried with a wink. An impatient voice then boomed from the inner office. "Ms. Moneylist, please skip the customary chipping and putting, and send 008 in." She looked frustrated, but 008 gave her a shrug and his patented broad smile. "I hate to pitch and run, Moneylist, but duty calls." 008 then ducked into the inner office, and greeted the man behind the desk. "Good AM, Commissioner Finchem. Sorry for the delay, I was just working on my approaching shot." The commissioner huffed, trying not to grin, even forcing a frown. "008, aside from your little short game with Ms. Moneylist, where have you been?" "Sir, I've been completing my 1999 mission. It took me to places like San Diego, Columbus, Chicago, Boston, Lake Buena Vista, Houston, Spain, and most recently the Far East." "Yes, 008, you made a real mark in Chicago, I understand. Won twice there?" "Thank you, commissioner, yes, the Western Open and athe PGA championship. I had a devil of a time with a Spanish operative named Sergio Garcia there. It seems he is a most worthy adversary." The Commissioner nodded knowingly and reached the talk button on his intercom speaker. "You displayed your usual stiff upper lip, 008. Before we talk about your 2000 mission, I want to introduce you to someone who can help. Moneylist, "he said, "send in Q would you?" 008 lifted an eyebrow and asked, "Q, Commissioner?" "Yes, Q" answered a white haired man as he bust into the office. "Q as in the q in the word equipment." Gadagets are my game, you see. Diamond faced spin wedges, trouble clubs, oversized drivers, inner gel balls, thermodynamic shoes, wrap around sunglasses, and the like. Just call me Q, and your are??" "Woods? Tiger Woods," he answered after the customary dramatic pause and lift of an eyebrow. "Just call him 008, Q," the commissioner insisted, "and do get to the point." "Yes, well 008, I am told by intelligence that you ran into trouble with the boulders and stones this year? " ( That would be in Colorado) "You might say it was a bit of a rocky year in that regard Q," 008 playfully answered testing Q's patience. "Joke if you must 008 , but with this new flint-stone ball retriever you won't need help moving giant sized impediment in the desert or hurt your wrist by hitting your ball from next to a rock," Q explained. (TW did that in Houston) "It contains a tiny microchip that sends out a sonic wave that instantly turns the rock to rubble." "Great," said 008 grabbing the ball retriever and dead panning, "Let's rock and roll." Just as Q was about to chastise 008 for his flippancy, the commissioner broke in. "that'll be enough, Q, thank you very much. You're excused." 008 then stood next to the commissioner's desk, repeatedly bouncing a golf ball off the end of the retriever, even holding it between his legs and behind his back. The commissioner tried not to noticed as he began to spell out 008's new mission. "Your new assignment, which we shall call, 'Operation Tiger Y2K,' will have all the usual danger and excitement , 008." "You mean, glamorous locations, formidable opponents and high stakes?" "Indeed, 008. Operation Tiger Y2K will take you to the Hawaian Islands, Scotland, spain, and Buenos Aires." "Will I get to go to.....?" "Yes, yes 008," the commissioner allowed,"you will get to go to Disney World too." 008 smiled, still bouncing the golf ball on the retriever. "I want to warn you, though, Woods, your trip to Washington DC, will not be easy. A band of operatives from Australia, Argentina, S. Africa, Japan, and Fiji will be there with the Presidents Cup in their possession. It is imperative that you help recover that cup, 008." Suddenly , Woods bounced the ball high into the air and caught it in his pocket. 008 turned to the comissioner, his smile replaced by a penetrating and serious glare. He crouched down and put both his hands on either side of his eyes, as if staring down a putt. "Remember one thing, commissioner. When it comes to golf and "Tiger Y2K' the world is not enough.