Fan Fiction: Boyfriends XX

[mano]

Do not adjust your monitors, you have just entered...the Boyfriends Fan Fiction Zone (AKA BFFF) If you are feeling lightheaded, dizzy, and see Michael Jordan back with the Chicago BULLs (pun intended), you must STOP, click the "Back button" and seek medical attention quickly. If you happen to have a good sense of humor and realize that this is truly 100 % PURE FAN FICTION, then welcome to our humble abode. Remember, we are not responsible for any mental injuries that might occur upon seeing the fictional stories and pictures. In other words, enter at your own risk. However, we do offer BFFF Life Insurance. Ask one of our agents for more info. Without further ado...(drum roll) May I present the stars of the show... Paul Kariya and Michelle Kwan (Standing Ovation) <img src=http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Flats/3170/portrait.jpg> ABSolute Role Models!!! <img src=http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Flats/3170/abs.jpg> As the photosplicer responsible for the above pics, Chemy, would say "You are now in BFFF channel" Mascot <img src=http://store1.yimg.com/I/opane_1528_159003249> BFFF Archives <A HREF=http://www.angelfire.com/me2/KwanFanFiction/ >http://www.angelfire.com/me2/KwanFanFiction/ </A> The above disclaimer was paid for by the Friends of Michelle & Paul (AKA FOMP) a non-profit (and I mean non as in non-existent, right Yingshan?) organization.

[chemy]

Rehearsal <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/rehearsal.jpg> ROTFL Re Ice Age Cometh, Mano!!! I better train in Japanese Anime...

[bearpaw]

Very, very nice introduction Mano!!!! Chemy - thanks for putting our BFFF dreams in pictures! NLK - we haven't heard from you lately. Any sightings?

[littlepebbles1]

<img src=http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/3087/pictures/paulcard2.jpg> :oD

[mano]

Did you know you forgot to put that in BFFF XIX? That's the reason why Yingshan docked your pay for a month, hehehe. Bearpaw, thanks and also LOL on your wonderful story in "Introverts" at FSW. Chemy, JapAnime is something we should experiment on. This will insure we don't get stuck in any "ruts," toothpaste or otherwise. Blizzard can be our guide. And LOVE the "rehearsal" pic. They are naturals at this aren't they?

[littlepebbles1]

It was right after the PK article you posted. Let's just say I better not have lost a month of pay of else.... ;o)

[mano]

How in the world did I miss those ABS!!! Must have been distracted, I was. LOL, Chemy on Lord Tetsuhiko's Anime pic. I was hoping his hair would be black and a bit more spiky, but it's anime, anything goes. Nice job though. I guess as long as his wife doesn't end up with pink hair, hehehe. Thanks to all who liked the story so far. Didn't think it had a feather to fly with, but when it's based on a Duck and a Swan, there's bound to be a lot of feathers lying around. Yingshan...I must confer with Chemy first to find out if she's going to sign. Running out of blood as it is. Oh, and Sharon, no I'm not a novelist...just read too many and daydream way too much for my own good, is all.

[Sharon]

Oh well mano, at least you know you have a new job if you need one!

[littlepebbles1]

MK is presenting at the American Teacher Awards tonight and PK is out of town. Hoping she won't show up with some other guy. [praying]

[Karin]

Shep again!!!

[chemy]

Coming to theaters near you "Austin Powers On Ice" Starring Dr Speedy <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/drspeedy.jpg> TBC Sorry guys, pretty quiet in MK-PK photosplice lab. Rowen, I'm not as familiar w/ Anime (I do get a kick out those spiky hair). What does IAD mean? Mano, I've been practicing signing my name on water Bwahahaha. Yingshan, where's the dotted line ;-). Mano, are you sure it's Tetsuhiko and not Tetsuhiro? The former sounds like a girl's name (ie Yoko, Miko, Aiko, -ko ending). Any -ro ending is more for guys (ie Ichiro, Jiro, Toshiro etc). Right, Blizzard? Please, nothing less than masculine for our hero, Mano. LOL. Btw, Tetsu means iron. If we call PK "Tetsujin," he's "Iron-Man." No sight of Mr Wrong Date tonight. Whew, close call.

[MarcellaMichelle]

Nice work--loved the enforcer :-) I used to think it was stupid that my Dad gave me the middle name Michelle because he liked that Beatles song so much but maybe he knew something I didn't? Or maybe he just has the same taste in music as the Kwans. LOL! Here is my next favor, Chemy. A wedding on ice! That would be too cool and appropriate too. Hope we will all be invited.

[Rowen]

This is so amusing. All these pictures and stuff. Maybe I should get into the act. Rowen *The person formerly known as IAD*

[blizzard]

I'm not quite sure with names, doesn't have to be formal though for this board; but ro is a common ending for guy names. I think we should bring back that tekken 3 guy for the role of little kariya *hint-hint* mano. Ice commeth wa totemo iidesunee ;) I can't wait for the second installment.

[Rowen]

I'm not sure if Blizzard's post was directed toward me or not, but to all of you who might be curious about why I changed my name, here is the explanation. I post in several forums(one for aviation, this one, one for tennis, and one for gymnastics). I also had different user names for each one. I finally decided to synchronize things and chose the name Rowen, the name of my favorite character from Japanese Anime(I chose the name used in the American dubs).

[mano]

Dagnabit, er, uh excuse me while I grab a band aid or tournaquet or something...making a mess over here. Man I'm feeling lightheaded all of a sudden...THUD!!!

[NLK9]

what a coincedence.. Hey you all! Sorry I haven't posted lately..even Bond..NLK9 Bond needs time off... Okay Ill admit: yes I have been a baaad girl. Sorry but I have been drooling over Paul at the last few games and haven't looked for Michelle at all. If it makes you guys feel better, I slipped on the puddle and hurt myself..(But then Paul rushed over and helped me up hehe) Wow I just had an Ally McBeal moment...surprise surprise. 2 of my friends are going to the game tomorrow with me.. so we'll all watch out for Michelle..when we peel our eyes off our men.. *sigh*...

[mano]

TPFKAI (The Poster Formerly Known As IAD). Glad you can join us and yes do contribute your creative talents. Can never have too much blood spilled, er, I mean fun filled stories and pics at BFFF. Chemy, I'm pretty sure PK's Japanese name is Tetsuhiko. BTW, Tetsujin is a character in that game Tekken Tag Tournament. Same game where I got that cute pic of Jin Kazama that Blizzard was referring to. BTW, Blizzard, arigatoo gozaimasu. NLK9!!! For shame, how can you fall in love with PK. Remember, one of the commandments of BFFF is "Thou shalt not fall in love with PK, unless you happen to be Michelle Kwan." Yingshan 9:6. Oy, don't want to be around when the high priestess finds out else I'm crispified by association!!!

[mano]

Anaheim Pond. "I love mushy cookies...especially for dessert." "PAUL, behave!!!" *** The above tapped wire conversation was brought to you by Omnipoint. For clearer, crispier connection, use Omnipoint.

[mano]

Where the h*ck is everybody. Methinks everyone is on holiday. Happy Turkey everyone. Sharon, forgiveness, no Ice Age installment until next week probably, don't have time to work on it or any other story for that matter. When it's end of month at my work, means I have to do overtime. I'm actually writing this from work. BTW, it might be a while before they meet. If I had my druthers, I'd have them hitched the minute they meet. You know, Tetsuhiko and Wing sitting on a tree...(fast forward)...Baby Carriage...THE END. And as for the Mighty Ducks team, what is up with them? If they start winning maybe their attendance will pick up...that or have MK skate every game, shoot I'd get season tickets, hehehe just kidding. If I could I'd rant about them, but I wont. Skatingfan, nothing to be jealous of now in terms of teams. After the Mets and Yankees, all the NY teams pretty much stink right now, and double trouble for me in hockey 'cause both the Rangers and the Ducks are bottom dwellers at the moment, sigh. Okay, back to work, see ya!!!

[littlepebbles1]

BTW, it might be a while before they meet. If I had my druthers, I'd have them hitched the minute they meet. You know, Tetsuhiko and Wing sitting on a tree...(fast forward)...Baby Carriage...THE END. What do you mean? Aren't you the one writing the story? ;o) Do the Ducks have any home games this 4 day weekend? Maybe Michelle will decide to go since she won't have class.

[skatingfan]

So let me understand #9 will have mushy cookie for desert, is that after perfect 6.0 has a special duck for the main course?

[Rowen]

Skatingfan, your comment is hilarious!!!

[Sharon]

You are forgiven mano! I'm just being selfish and impatient, but REALLY, you do write beautifully! Happy Turkey to you and all!

[littlepebbles1]

He was on some 30 minute show called NHL Goal Shots this evening for a few minutes. He was teaching one of the hosts (a blond lady) how to skate on the ice and showing her what was the inside edge and what was the outside edge and the lady just didn't seem to be getting it. Hey PK, forget blondie and get someone who already knows the difference between the edges.

[mano]

Hope they repeat it!!! Can't believe the lady didn't get the edges. PK I have two words for you, "KWAN SPIRAL!!!" Inside edge to outside edge spiral. Check out the lean of Michelle through out the whole move. See the body control as she changes from the inside to the outside edge. Well, he's forgiven if he actually thought about Michelle Kwan, but, sigh, none of us are telepathic...more like telepathetic, hehehehe. LOL skatingfan, methinks you are right. A roast Duck for the main course is a perfect compliment to mushy cookies. I bow to your culinary expertise!!! I say, add some Red wine, romantic Violin music, and mood lighting. Bon appetit!!!

[yingshan]

Skatingfan, great line! Yeah, they made a delicious meal, don't they? :-) ESPN has a blond reporter? Hmm...who is that? How does she look? MD will play at Dallas on Friday and Nashville on Saturday. After that, they'll have a couple days off. Their next game will be on 12/1 at home. Poor #9. They probably fly to Dallas today and won't be back until late Saturday night.

[chippy4mk]

I went to Predators vs MD last night. PK goaled TWICE! and MD won. My seat was on the 3rd level so that I had to follow him with my binoculars. Wow! he is soooo cute!

[mano]

Glad you got to see him live. Still wish the Ducks played the Rangers here at the Garden. I would love to see PK give the defensemen a cold with his speed, see Teemu score a goal, and Stu beat someone up. That would make my day, hehehe. Thanks Sharon!!! We have a whole slew of great writers here at BFFF such as Littlepebbles, Bearpaw, MarcellaMichelle, Akemi_chan, skatingfan, Yingshan, and Blizzard. I'm in wonderful company. BTW, I MISS their stories!!! Isn't crispification still in effect here?!? Skatingfan, you are correct IAM is Biblically based from Exodus 3:14, "I AM WHO I AM." Funny thing is I didn't even know that verse was all in caps 'til your question brought me to dust off my Bible (I've been bad, sigh) and research. It's my kudos to God for being a Great Author, heehee.

[littlepebbles1]

Chemy, Wonder, Magenta, Akemi_Chan, where are yall?

[Karin]

I was ROTFL with your pic of Dr.Speedy!!!...

[chemy]

ROTFL, Mano & Skatingfan. Don't forget for afterdinner: love potion no. 9 (just kidding). I caught the latest MKF rage: MK/PK personal pic. Check out mine. Thanks Karin for the compliment. Sorry folks--been under the weather lately. But look, scene from the Duckpond: "He puckers..." <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/lafs.jpg>

[Sharon]

Yes mano, I really enjoy everyone and particularly the graphics, but I LOVE your story! Chemy, how cute is your personal picture and your recent graphic!

[akemi_chan]

wells, the computer was being moved outta my room because we were changing carpet and i had a ton of homework....so i haven't been able to post here until now...so, how's everything going....i heard the ducks won.....that's good news....i luv that picture! if only it were real...<sigh> oh wells.

[mano]

Absolutely CLASSIC!!! I can actually picture that. With my imagination it's no problemo. BTW, did you all know I always pictured MK skating Rach at the Pond way back in the day? Didn't think PK puckered up then, thanks Chemy. Hey, how about some more personal pics for us faithful few. That pose of theirs is one of my faves. Akemi_Chan, welcome back. We missed you. As you can see, Littlepebbles had to go to extreme measures to get your attention. LOL on the very cute anime pics on the Ice Age. Which anime did you get that from. Chemy can use all the help, unfortunately, Yingshan is only going to give us 20%...sigh. Lastly, want to see some Dux in Tux? click on the link and check out 94 pics of the Duck players in Tux. It was for a charity event at the Disneyland Hotel. The Ducks had to serve food and drink, I think. There's about 6-7 pics on PK scattered in there. Didn't look like he brought a date (thank God). Unfortunately, they didn't put the names of the players there. You can tell who's with who by the handholding and that's stuff. Some are just pics of fans having a great time. Anywho, enjoy: (BTW, my fave PK pic is slide #75, probably missing MK...) <A HREF=http://www.mightyducks.com/multimedia/tuxslide001.html>http://www.mightyducks.com/multimedia/tuxslide001.html</A>

[chemy]

Thank you Sharon and A-Chan. Wow, I'm seeing new names. Welcome to BFFF planet. ROTFL, A-Chan--LUV the animes! Did you draw those? And LUV the story, Manang Mano. Alright, as per Mano's request, here are more BFFF personal pics. Of course, none can be used outside BFFF zone, lest you risk ridicule and/or scorn from non-BFFFers. So let's confine the pics w/in our Fiction borders. And yes there's more to come... <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic2.jpg> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic2.jpg >http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic2.jpg </A> <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic3.gif> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic3.gif >http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic3.gif </A> <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic4.gif> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic4.gif >http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic4.gif </A> Yeay, more PK pics (re Dux in Tux). What's w/ his bow tie--it's crooked!

[skatingfan]

#9 finds himself in a disturbing mood. He misses 6.0. He has been so busy lately that he can not believe this is December already. December 19, 6.0 will be in Kennewick Washington for a competition. If he has his way, he does not want his love to ever set foot in the State of Washington. He was on the phone all day trying to charter flights and limo service to take 6.0 to Kennewick, so there will absolutely be no chance she would fly to Seatle en route to Kennewick. Of course he has not disclose his plan to his love yet. The phone rang he expected the travel agent, and it turned out to be practically the whole team on the othe side of the line. They congratulated him about the new house, "nest" they call it. And he was chided for keeping it a secret, that he and 6.0 bought a house and they have to find out from a BA bulletin. So she bought a house, and didn't tell me, this girl owns more houses than any 19 y/o in the entire state of CA. He joked with her before when she bought the A frame in Lake A. that the next time she goes house hunting, he hopes she will be wearing his ring. He told himself just to calm down and call her. __________________________________________________ _____________________ 6.0 is resting comfortably on a sofa, in the new house. She is very happy that her parents decided to buy a house in L.A. They will be spending more time in L.A. and less time in Lake A. There is one more reason she is happy about her parents decision, this could be kind of a refuge for her if things at school become too crazy. She loves the dorm life etc. But the guys at school have figured out her class schedule, and they are camping outside her dorm, trying to carry her books for her etc. The size of the classes she is attending is growing, a lot of guys are auditing those classes. She thought about telling her parents and her love about it, but then decded against it b/c she did not want them to worry. So when they announced their decision of house hunting in L.A., 6.0 jumped with joy and went along with them. She was there with her parents at the financing and closing, it was a nice experience for her. Her sister gave very good decoration ideas for their room, yes, there is a room in the house for them. Karen should be calling any minute about more decoratoin ideas. 6.0 was reminescing the fun times growing up with her sister when her cell phone rang. 6.0 still thinking about her sister," Hi.... K(aren)." #9, " Hi, What (who) are you thinking about." 6.0, " Oh about the usfsa competition, mom and dad booked tickets, we will be flying to Seatle, and stay there for a day to visit some family friends after that we will be driving the rest of the way." "Seatle" that word hit #9 at 150 mph like a puck. Calm down, he told himself, I need to talk about something else before returning to this one. #9, " Have you been on a buying spree lately?" #9 privately thinks, will she tell me about the house. 6.0, " Santa told me there is nothing for you this year, you have been a naughty duck." #9 protested, "in what way?" 6.0, " Hmmmm......, last weekend....., I have been wearing turtle necks to school everyday this week." #9, " It would give me such pleasure if you would get even.............." Bleep, the content of the conversation melted the computer chips in 6.0's cell phone.

[littlepebbles1]

Is it me or is it hot in here? Hot enough to melt computer chips, in fact. Great story Skatingfan!!! Welcome back Akemi_chan and Chemy. Wonder and Magenta are still MIA, so are Imzadi and Kooky, sorry I forgot to include them earlier. And great pics as usual, Chemy.

[mano]

Oy, that was a nice, relaxing, albeit had to shut the door to my room 'cause of intense heat emanating from the monitor type of reading!!! Sigh, who needs a heater when you gots skatingfan's stories!!! Thanks, I've missed that. So who's next, heehee!!!

[chemy]

I think I've experienced exothermic reaction...where's my liquid Nitrogen to cool down?? HOT! Skatingfan! Be gentle w/ your readers LOL Thanks Li'pebs. Ahem, Mano. Look again at the Dux in Tux pics (how could you not notice???): <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/duxtux.jpg> More personal BFFF pics <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic5.jpg> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic5.jpg >http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic5.jpg </A> <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic6.jpg> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic6.jpg>http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic6.jpg</A>

[Sharon]

Great job skatingfan! Chemy, you're graphics are so great! How do you do them so seamlessly? I'm using one of the personals....THANK YOU!

[akemi_chan]

i luv all the pictures....and maybe some day we will see the real ones in the OC register titled "the newly weds" he heee.....wells, i got those anime pictures in the "ice age" thread from here: <A HREF=(http://bishounen.org/)>(http://bishounen.org/)</A>

[mano]

You are so right, I finally saw the light and realized PK was hiding MK all those other times I checked out the slideshow. BTW, Skatingfan was correct, MK's all "turtlenecked" up to hide the evidence, hehehe...

[chemy]

You're welcome, Sharon. I use Adobe PhotoDeluxe for graphics. Here's a quick demo (apologies to the owner of the screen cap pic): 1--Select pics 2--Crop, resize 3--Paste Tada! <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/demo1.jpg> <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic7.jpg> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic7.jpg >http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic7.jpg </A> <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/bfpic.gif> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/bfpic.gif >http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/bfpic.gif </A> <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic8.jpg> <A HREF=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic8.jpg >http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic8.jpg </A>

[chemy]

More from Dux in Tux photo gallery. Give MK a veil and the title of the pic would've been "After the exchange of vows..." (in our dreams of course) <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/duxtux2.jpg> Thanks A-Chan. Where's NLK9?

[Sharon]

Thanks for the demo! You make it look so easy, although I'm sure it takes a lot of work (fun)!

[yingshan]

I'm back from Boston (business trip). Hmm...nobody missed me. I'm hurt (slave-drivers have feelings too). I went sightseeing around Harvard and wondered where Karen Kwan was. Too bad Michelle didn't enroll in Harvard. Skatingfan! WOW! We have a new shooting star in fiction land. See our attorney for a contract. It's hot, hot, hot. Where are our spies? No news from the 6 & 9? Chemy, loved the formally dressed couple. But I believe you're behind on your quota. And talking about quota, where is Crispy? She's so far behind that I have to turn her into extra extra extra crispy. Oh, welcome all the newcomers. We may sound strage. But once you get to know us, we're actually all very likable and ...cuddly? :-)

[NLK]

I'm here...there hasn't been any sightings of 6.0 sad to say, plenty of #9 though! ;) Sorry I have been very busy..haven't had time to update you all...I wonder if MK has got wind of this Kariya vs. Kariya game tomorrow. (In case you haven't heard Paul and little bro Steve are facing off tomorrow at the Pond.) It is being talked about everywhere so I'm thinking, depending on where she is, she may come check this out. I'm sure there is going to be a ton of people there...including me. :)I'll tell ya all about it. Chemy: I love that pic of PK and MK at Dux N Tux Kinda jealous of it actually hehe sorry baad NLK

[skatingfan]

I figure you must have been playing golf at the rssif country club.

[kjesse]

Chemy love the pictures, now if we could see some of those lovely abs on #9 in my little pic. I'd be in heaven. NLK the game Wed night should really be exciting. Try not to spend all your time watching #9, let us know if you see 6.0. I wish I was going to be there considering I only live about 15 mins. from the pond. It's going to be on FSN2 @730pm pacific time for those of you with cable. Mano do the Ducks get much TV time on the East Coast? You've probably mentioned it previously but how did you become a Ducks fan? They played great the last two games, hopefully thats a good sign. In today's Orange County Register there's an article that mentions what #9 does at intermissions during a game. <A HREF=http://www.ocregister.com/sports/hockey/ducex007w.shtml >http://www.ocregister.com/sports/hockey/ducex007w.shtml </A>

[mano]

KJesse. I only get the honor of watching the Ducks when ESPN2 decides to show it. That's why in a way, I don't want Disney to sell the Ducks 'cause it's more air time for their team right? That and the Ducks better get to the playoffs so that they will be on prime time. Became a fan of hockey when I saw the '97 All Star super skills game. Didn't think Hockey could be that fun. Just needed a team to root for aside from the NY Rangers. Saw Kariya featured on ESPN Sportscenter and did some research in Dec. '97. Found the Ducks to be exciting and started rooting for them. MK didn't win Olys, PK got concussion and they looked like a perfect match to me. Rest is history. Nothing like bad times to bring two people together in my head. BTW, I'm officially bummed they don't get to play the Rangers at Madison Square Garden 'cause that would have been the only time I get to see the Ducks play live this year. I envy all yous who have seen the Ducks play live. And with the NHL thinking of changing the format to have teams only play other teams in their conference, I'd bummed even more 'cause I'd have to fly to Anaheim just to see a game, sigh. So for all the people attending the games, good reports please. And hopefully the Ducks will go on a mad win streak. (I am not a jinx, I am not a jinx, I am not a jinx...) Well, there is always Digital Satellite TV. But need money, sigh again.

[mano]

I've offering on the table, oh high priestess...why do I get crispified. And yes you were missed sorely by us. (mano moves to the left and watches while lightning strikes chair she just vacated.) Chemy, lovely pic. I suggest Pachelbel's Canon in D(?!?) for the entrance march.

[skatingfan]

As one of my friend said, it is a lovely piece of music, so overdone especially for weddings. "That Parkabell canon.", he would say. Someone should compose a new piece just for them. Our production company has $.

[skatingfan]

Please read my message to you in the Ice Age thread, thanks.

[mano]

The Ducks haven’t figured out what’s keeping them at a mediocre .500 record since the beginning of the season. Their coach Craig Hartsburg has tried splitting up the Dynamic Duo of Paul Kariya and Teemu Selanne and placed them in different lines to give the other players’ offense a boost. The tactic has worked in some games, was ineffective in others. Captain Paul Kariya has been racking his lovely intelligent brain trying to figure out why their team has been distracted of late. Today however, he decided to visit the Public Relations office at Anaheim Pond to check out the fan mail. He needed to relax and what better way than to read letters from fans who absolutely adore you regardless of the team’s record (mano notwithstanding). Upon arriving at the PR office he noticed two other Duck players crowding around the computer of one of the Admin assistants. They were defenseman Pascal Trepanier and Center Matt Cullen, respectfully beating each other up in what seems to be a heated game of football on the computer. “Hey guys what are you up to?” Paul Kariya said watching over the shoulder of his two teammates. “Oh, just trying out Madden 2000. One of the fans seems to have sent it. Knew some of us liked football.” Matt Cullen said without turning his head from the monitor. “Wow, you seem to have dedicated fans.” Paul said, smiling while shaking his head. “Well, not as dedicated nor obsessed as yours. You got a game, oomph, a book before about that skater, that’s what I was going to say.” Pascal said, giving Matt Cullen a look that translated ‘I’ll get you later’ for the elbow on the ribs. Whether Paul noticed the exchange between Cullen and Trepanier remains to be seen. He didn’t even bat an eye. Paul just smiled, remembering the book “Heart of a Champion” he received from an admiring fan that happened to look up to Michelle Kwan too. He decided to leave the two alone to concentrate on their game. He still has to go through a ton of mail and see which one he or his sister Michiko can give attention to. Pascal and Matt just released a collective sigh of relief. “Great, now just do an alt tab to switch to the other window. Gosh thought Paul would never leave.” Pascal said. “Okay, so where were we. Weren’t we choosing the costumes?” Matt said. “Nope, we got that covered, I think we were thinking about the spiral.” “Spiral?” A familiar voice asked again. Paul Kariya came through the door that separated the offices and headed towards the two guilty looking players. “Alt tab, alt tab!!!” Pascal whispered quickly. “I did, quit shaking my arm.” Matt said before both players grinned like Chesire cats, wishing they were able to disappear too. “Did I hear someone mention spiral?” Paul asked, now very curious. “Oh, yes, uh, just mentioning that Elway has one of the better spirals in his passes. My Denver Broncos will beat Matt’s Minnesota Vikings any time.” Pascal replied calmly. “You wish, Brett Favre has a better spiral, remember that pic he had with, oomph, with Reggie White. Perfect Hail Mary pass it was, yeah, that’s what I meant.” Matt said then gave Pascal the same look he received earlier for the elbow to the ribs. “So let me get this straight. You guys are playing Madden 2000, with two retired players, that being White and Elway and you got Favre making Hail Mary passes to the Hall of Fame ‘Minister of Defense’ for the Minnesota Vikings? Are you sure you guys are talking about Football?” Paul asked dubiously. “Well, ah, Madden 2000 now offers a free agency, trades, arbitration and the like as well as un-retiring players. So I traded for Favre from Greenbay and got White back…” Matt explained hurriedly. Paul looked at them strangely then decided to let them off the hook again and went back into the other office to finish up his fan mail. Matt and Pascal collectively wiped the sweat off their brows.

[mano]

Good save Matt, almost as good as [goalie] Guybo [Hebert]. Now lets finish this off. So we settled on the Lyra costume with the Kwan Spiral in the center.” Pascal said. “Why the Kwan spiral when the Charlotte is just as effective? The Red Violin costume has the same effect too.” Matt suggested. “Nope, the Kwan spiral shows more cleavage…” “Cleavage?” That same familiar voice followed by a head peeking from the other room. “Did I hear someone say cleavage?” Paul Kariya knew something was not right and suspected it from the start. “Well uh, you know, we were choosing plays and thought that the dime defense.” “Nickel defense.” “Thanks, Paul, nickel defense can best be exploited by a running back CLEAVING through the defense on Third down to distract them from going after the receivers, yeah that’s what we meant by cleavage.” Pascal improvised quickly. “Good save Pascal, maybe we should tell Guybo, oomph! Hey that’s the second time.” Matt said and hits Pascal back. “Children, children, calm down. Uncle Paul will now stop the interrogation and leave you both alone. Happy?” Paul said soothingly, albeit with a smirk on his face. He was heading towards the next room again when he heard a voice he didn’t expect to hear at all. “Just skate.” “Michelle?” Paul spun around, saw Matt bang the speakers and Pascal whistle the National Anthem of Canada. He approached them again, arms folded across his chest and stared at the computer that still featured the Vikings and Broncos going at it. “Did I hear Michelle say ‘just skate’?” Paul asked. “No way, just the speakers, been telling the Admin to change them. Gives Madden a girly voice instead of his usual blustery one.” Matt replied. “And Madden actually meant ‘Just Steak.’ It’s the Thanksgiving game and instead of the six legged Turkey, we now can have Steak, Chiante and some Fava beans, ahem, to go.” Pascal said. He then looked at the still serious looking Paul and started whistling an interesting rendition of the Star Spangled Banner. “Paul, finally.” One of the Admin assistants said. Needless to say, both Pascal and Matt collectively sighed and wiped their sweating brows in relief…but not for long. “Did you receive your Michelle Kwan Figure Skating PC game? It was sent by a group calling themselves Beefers or something, with names like Chemy, Littlepebbles, Magenta, Wonder, Bearpaw, Skatingfan, Blizzard, Akemi_chan, NLK9, Marcella, Annabelle, Kooky, Rowen, Imzadi, Shallah, Sharon, Rowen, Kjesse, littlepang, some person named after a disease, and their high priestess Yingshan (did I forget anybody?). The guys borrowed it an hour ago to try it since they were bored with the Madden 2000 game I downloaded from videogames.com.” The admin assistant said innocently while pointing at Pascal and Matt. She smiled and then left the room soon after. “An explanation would be nice.” Paul said with an I-got-you-now smile painted on his face. Simultaneously, he heard two voices chime, “He did it,” and “oomph!” The End – well at least for Pascal and Matt for now...heehee.

[kjesse]

Classic Mano! I'm grinning like a Chesire the whole time I'm reading it, not to mention the frequent bursts of laughter. Thank goodness I'm the only person in my computer center until 8AM, but then when they get here they get mad cuse I'm in such a good mood. To top it off the Broncos have been "my team" for the last 10 years so to see them mentioned in print was cool. Keep up the good work. As a gift of thanks for your excellence in story telling I give you this: <A HREF=http://sports.latimes.com/news/19991208/hko/19991208fmebmnke.html >http://sports.latimes.com/news/19991208/hko/19991208fmebmnke.html </A>

[kjesse]

Here's another tidbit: <A HREF=http://www.ocregister.com/sports/kariy008w.shtml>http://www.ocregister.com/sports/kariy008w.shtml</A>

[NLK]

Great articles and Great story Mano I was laughing throughout! I loved it. Bravo Mano. :) See ya all after the game. *sigh* I can don't know if I can handle it!

[Sharon]

tears of laughter mano! I can picture it so vividly!

[Sharon]

Maybe I'm slow, but what happened to my personal pic? I seem to have misplaced PK ;-(!

[Sharon]

I think it's gone because Skatingfan clued me in on posting the pic in the other sections? SORRY! Can you rename the pic so I can use it here and I will choose one with Michelle only for the other sections? THANK YOU!

[blizzard]

You are like the write-o-matic! First your wonderful ongoing story at Ice Age...and now you're back to the sweet ol' Paul stories *sigh*. Hail to the diseas...I mean er mano :)

[yingshan]

approves the offering (slightly nodding her regal head). Now, the high priest demands two more to make up for past neglect, which is construed as disrepect.

[mano]

Inspiration stemmed from desperation from Yingshan's crispification threat, heehee. BTW, KJesse, thanks for all the articles, already archived for future references. (This part was added thanks to edit feature after seeing Yingshan's new post before mine.) EGADS Yingshan!!! 2 more? Oy vey. Littlepebbles help, 'tis your turn to please the high priestess!!! Sheesh, here I thought skatingfan already appeased her with her story...

[skatingfan]

I think Littlepang is a beefer too. BTW, I need to review my music and geography lessons. When I wrote on the other board about a guest conductor from vancouver to LA philharmonic, I meant #9 who was born? at least raised in Vancouver. This guest conductor is making heavenly violin music with a violinist who was born near L.A. And talk about harmonious music that is filled with phil (love) You were thinking about the dueling hockey brothers. I was so lost till I read that article today.

[mano]

Edit completed and littlepang's in the fold. BTW, your post at FSW threw me for a loop at first 'cause I couldn't get it. The only guy I knew coming from Vancouver now was Steve Kariya so I figured you knew about the pending Canucks/Ducks - Kariya vs Kariya thing. But gosh your explanation now makes sense and yes, PK and MK do make a harmonious couple. Wish they'd start making some music together that actually gets printed on LA Times or OC Register or People, or ESPN or something, anything for us starving Beefers, sigh...

[akemi_chan]

and literally...fishy....in an article in the oC register there was something about the kariya bros. and there was a cute picture...but anyways, they went out the dinner at Nieuport 17 (i wanna go there someday...looks nice...) a sea food restaurant (get it...fishy? he he corny joke) and people asked who paid for the dinner....uyou know, with pk's salary being so much larger...and paul said steve forgot his wallet so he paid, but steve said that paul gave him this killer look that said "i'll pay for it, don't even think about picking up that check" (well, that's what it kinda said in the register)....sounds like we have two different stories here....maybe they didn't go out to dinner at all!! could it be that PK went to Nieuport 17 with michelle?! their scheme could've gone like this... "Okay steve, i'm going out with michelle tonite, but i don't want the press hounding us...would you do me a HUGe favor?" "Sure Paul, anything for my big bro!" "Just tell the press that WE'RE going out the dinner together and then they'll leave us alone. Just follow the same story line...we go to Nieuport 17 near my place, and that's it...oh and i'll pay the bill." "okie dokie big bro....i'll be sure to folllow through with this....see you at the big game!" but little did they know that a little difference in story lines would stfike up suspicion in the BFFF.....

[akemi_chan]

that PK is a two time winner of the Lady Byng award? that's an award for most gentlemanly behavior or sportsmanship on the ice...as in he doesn't tend to run people into the boards or have a lot of physical contact or something...i think that's sooo neat because both PK and MK have great sportsmanship!

[mano]

I definitely liked your scenario better and yup it does sound fishy now that I look back at those articles. Love your version, how about tell us what happens at the restaurant between PK and MK. Details would be a plus, heehee. Lovely isn't it? PK wins the Lady Byng twice for sportmanlike conduct. Means he doesn't like to get into fights and the like, just play the game...now why in tarnation did he decide MK could be a good defensive checker? Yeah, sure let the woman fight the fight for him, eh? Here are some Paul Pics to enjoy. The newer ones are at the bottom of the page. <A HREF=http://members.tripod.com/hockeylander/paulpics3.html>http://members.tripod.com/hockeylander/paulpics3.html</A>

[bearpaw]

Mano - you just hit another home run with that story! It was awesome!

[Karin]

More pics more pics!!!...

[mano]

I was watched Skate Canada sp last night on ESPN2 and formulated another BFFF X-file Theory: You all familiar with MK's Kiss & Cry routine with her touching her nose then her ear then wink etc, right? Anywho, last night as I was listening to her usual greeting, right after "I love you everybody," MK says "Hi Beamer, Hi 74." Okay, these nick-names could more than likely be UCLA friends she has or something...or Beamer = Teemu Selanne. Beamer is yuppie for BMW and we all know Teemu loves cars. Think he stopped counting at 30 or something. 74 = Paul Kariya. Hey, the guy was born on Oct 16, 1974. So, hey, 74. Couldn't say "Hi 9" 'cause that's a dead giveaway. Or BFFF X-Files Theory = mano grasping as straws again, heehee. BTW A-Chan, I too think that PK's pic with his brother would look good with MK's People Magazine pic (sans Steve of-course). Same pose, methinks. Oh CHEMY, where art thou?!?

[blizzard]

:( Reading mano's post about what she said after her program. I am thinking realistically here (apologies) as soon as I read it, when I saw 74 I thought of an athlete....a male athelete perhaps; who's jersey obviously does't adorn the #9 :( (no one in particular)

[chemy]

From OC Register <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkpkbacktoback.jpg> More personal pics <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic10.jpg> <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic9.jpg> A reissue for Sharon. (BTW, you can imagine how much I shrieked when I saw this outside BFFF threads. Let's be careful :-)) <img src=http://www.geocities.com:80/Tokyo/Flats/3170/mkbfpic11.jpg> Mano, clap clap clap for the latest masterpiece.

[Sharon]

I promise to be careful!

[mano]

You know, when the real bubble bursting time comes, I'll probably be as inconsolable as MK not getting gold again in 2002. Took me a while to get over '98 Olys, but hey, at least PK and MK share a silver. Come to think of it, I'm rootin' for Team Canada to win gold in 2002 for Hockey too. US, Finland, and Russia et al can fight for the other medals. That is if the NHL players go to the Olys in 2002. If not, I'm rooting for US then. Anywho, as I was saying, I depressed myself 'cause of MK's Kiss and Cry greeting. But I did investigate a couple of rosters for Bruins Basketball, Football, and Volleyball team, sorry, couldn't find Hockey team (do they have one?). Only #74 I found is an Offensive Right Guard named James Ghezzi and he ain't nothing to look at, apologies if he ever sees this. Want a pic, ookey, here it is: <img src=http://graphics.fansonly.com/photos/schools/ucla/sports/m-footbl/99roster/p-ghezzi.jpg> Also not familiar with any other hockey player with a #74 in the NHL. Most defensive linebackers I think have #'s in the 70's in the NFL. The LA Kings have no #74, so right now, it is a total mystery, sigh.

[littlepebbles1]

Girls play sports too. They could be females that live in Michelle's dorm. Or if they are guys, they could be platonic friends, or...uh...out of the closet. Great pics as usual, Chemy!

[MarcellaMichelle]

You're killing me with laughter over here! Of course, I can use it because I am right in the middle of grading final exams and that is a very TRYING experience. Not that my students don't provide me with a few laughs of my own. My husband with the totally bizarre sense of humor (why do you think I love him after all!) was watching one of those dog frisbee freestyle competitions on TV and since I wasn't looking he said that 6.0 had just completed a triple lutz frisbee catch and I could just picture #9 throwing it up as she skates down the ice. Now I can't get that image out of my head. Any cures for silly thoughts out there?

[skatingfan]

How about rooting for U.S,. get a gold in 2002 hockey, and PK get MVP for the game even though canada get silver. Or how about the ducks get the stanley cup for the next 10 years and PK get mvp instead. I believe since pk is a professional hockey player the stanley cup is more important anyways, JMHO. And no matter what happens, #9 is not going to take 6.0 away from U.S.A. and live somewhere in Canada after their wedding.

[Amelia]

How do you pronounce the name Kariya? Is it "Kah Rye Ah?" Or "Kar Ee Ya?" I've been trying to tell my sister about how funny "all y'all" are, but I keep confusing her by calling PK #9. I just don't know how to say his name! Amelia

[mano]

Canada hasn't won the gold in Hockey since God knows when, and it's their game sort of. Be nice for them to win it again with PK and probably his brother on board too. BTW, US hockey team still gots to redeem themselves for the Nagano incident. So if USA vs Canada for the Gold Medal, I'd root for Canada. See if USA can accept a Silver medal win with class a la MK. Here's to hoping MK wins the gold then too. Marcella, you are welcome. Thought I was depressing people in my last couple of post 'cause of my theories, but guess the Offensive Right Guard looks comedic, (apologies again). We missed you here, but knew you'd be busy with your students. Anywho, hope they did you proud and studied. Amelia, about PK's last name, most sportscasters pronounce it Ka-REE-Ya. Don't know how it's pronounced by a real Japanese. Chemy, love them pics, and you always deliver on time. Looks to me like we have to start BFFF XXI. Littlepebbles may be doing the honors.